Day 15: My 2013 Minnesota Twins Weight Loss Challenge

Weigh-in day!

Weigh-in day for my challenge is also AquaFit day. I wasn't looking forward to either, at least not at the beginning of the day. You can see below how I did on my weigh-in; despite my misgivings, I was happy. By lunch time, I'd finally started to look forward to the evening's AquaFit class. It was a bit more of a "grind" today (gee, surprise), but I felt fantastic when it was over. (Oh, and I made my first friends at class!) I even stopped at the grocery store on the way home because I decided I didn't have enough fresh veggies. Who am I???

Since my last post on discipline, the book we're reading at work for a book club had a lot to say about it. Holy Spirit timing, I suppose. This week's reading had an entire chapter on fasting, focusing on fasting as a key to self-discipline and self-discipline as necessary for a healthy spiritual life. This paragraph was so fitting for me this week:

Our lives change when our habits change. Our habits change when we make resolutions, remind ourselves of those resolutions, hold ourselves accountable for them, and perform them. Sometimes we fail, but there is no success that isn't checkered with failure. Don't give up. Press on, little by little. -Chapter 16, Rediscover Catholicism by Matthew Kelly

Good to ponder over the next few days.

Week 2 Weigh-In Results
Last week's cumulative total: -8.5 lbs
This week's total: -3.5 lbs
Total weight loss: -12 lbs

My nifty weight chart:


I have to say, I think I'm too optomistic on the Twins wins...

Day 12: My 2013 Minnesota Twins Weight Loss Challenge

When the dream turns into a grind...

I imagine that the average baseball player jumps into his first minor league season with gusto. Long road trips on a coach bus, cheap hotels and fast food? All part of the adventure! I bet it takes a little while, maybe a few weeks of Podunk towns and not enough sleep to get to him, but eventually, baseball becomes less of a dream and more of grind.

I've been feeling that a little bit with my challenge over the last two days. I'm not surprised; I fully expected it. I just don't enjoy it.

Sigh. And a small pity party. (Really, small. I promise.) Here goes:

Even though the scale changed (an extra big drop, I'll grant you) the first week, the overall impact on how I look and feel was minimal. Some days, it's just hard. And I wonder if my effort will be enough. How much of a difference will it make? What will I look like on the final day of the World Series? How will I feel? Sometimes, I think if knew the answers to these questions, if I could see into the future, it would be a lot easier to make the work worth it. Honestly, I think I want that as much for me as I want to be able to show people - everyone, I always feel self-conscious - and say, "See, this is really me. I'm just hiding right now." But I don't have that evidence. I just have to trust. And it is so, so hard some days. Like today.

Okay, put on the big girl panties and deal. Pity party over.

It might not be easy, but I would sure be ungrateful if I didn't remember in these moments the many, many ways I've been shown I'm never alone and I never have to doubt, even when I can't see the outcome. I'm pretty fortunate that I was reminded of this just a couple of days ago.

This Lent, which happens to almost exactly coincide with Spring Training, I've invited some friends to my home to study the weekly readings for the season. I read the readings for this weekend as I was preparing for our meeting (which was today). If you're interested, they can be found here:
http://www.usccb.org/bible/readings/022413.cfm

The First Reading from Genesis is one of my favorite readings. It's about God's promise to Abram. At the time, Abram and his wife Sarai were childless and aging, and they longed for a child with their whole beings. Without providing an explanation of how He will accomplish it, God promises that Abram's descendants will number as the stars, and that they will be given a land as their heritage.

And then, Abraham and Sarah (the name change came along with the covenant with God) waited. A really long time. Long past when they had any reasonable explanation for their hope, a hope that wasn't always as strong as they would have liked it to be since their story has been recorded for posterity. God did not change His mind or back out. Still, the wait was really, really long. Abraham and Sarah needed to learn some lessons along the way, and it was not an easy or perfect journey. However, in the end, God wanted what was best for them, and that included keeping His promise to them.

It might sound funny, but I really think "My 2013 Minnesota Twins Weight Loss Challenge" isn't just something I thought up all by myself. I think it was, at least in part, inspired by God who loves me so much that He wants what is best for me. That means (à la Matthew Kelly) being the "best version of myself" that God created me to be, and my health is a part of who I am and integral to my identity as God's creation.

For Abraham and Sarah, being the "best versions of themselves" included becoming the first parents of God's chosen people. It took a very long time and a lot of heartache before they received what was promised, a child. I'm glad I'm not called to be the mother of an entire nation; I know that's beyond my abilities. But it's still a long journey to becoming the best version of who I was created to be.

Successfully completing my challenge won't make me the best version of myself as a whole person, let alone in the area of my health. But it will be a big step. I desperately want it to be easier than this, and a much, much quicker process. But if that's how it worked, it would only be cosmetic. Losing the weight this way takes discipline, patience, discipline, humility, discipline, trust and discipline.

I guess I can see what good habit (virtue) God is telling me I need to practice to be who He wants me to be.

Day 8: My 2013 Minnesota Twins Weight Loss Challenge

The first weigh-in day! See below for results...

I have to say, I'm pretty happy with how I handled Week 1 of this crazy challenge. When the notion of this challenge dawned on me, it seemed more like something I was being called to rather than something I decided to aspire to. I'm a firm believe that God works through very ordinary means and through our desires and passions to speak to us. So, He chose to use my favorite baseball team to motivate me to change my health and my life.

Making it through Week 1 successfully, particularly this Week 1, is further proof that I'm not doing this on my own. (That's probably something I'll need to remember in the upcoming weeks and months when the going gets tougher, so I'll try to tuck that notion into my back pocket.)

I started my challenge on Mardi Gras because that's when Spring Training started. I spent the weekend on vacation eating out at restaurants. I had a dinner party, a time when I'm pridefully tempted to show off my cooking skills - and ignore calories in favor of taste - in order to please (and, I admit, in an attempt to impress) my guests. My refrigerator and pantry also contained a fair amount of food that fits into the "not exactly healthy" category. And, I needed to find a way to motivate myself to go to the gym - a place I find very, very intimidating - and workout strenuously enough that it matters, multiple times a week.

Oh, and to top it off, I had already decided to give up alcohol for Lent.

Each of those things challenges me to a greater or lesser degree, but together they create a pretty large challenge for me. And I did it! I don't really do a good job of patting myself on the back, so I'm going to let me myself acknowledge that I was successful this week and try not to feel guilty about acknowledging it. And I know I couldn't have done it without some extra grace and quite a few people who've given notes, words, looks, or prayers of support. Thank you!

One thing I've learned so far...Temperance is key.
This might seem like a natural notion to you, and it probably is. However, for as many times as I've heard it, it's never sunk in. One of my biggest challenges is self-control, and in the past, it's seemed like I'd never have it. While it's not just going to effortlessly stay around, I gained a little insight into how I actually can practice that "fruit of the Spirit".

I know it's only been a week, so it may seem like it's too soon to have had any "aha moments." It's not too soon to have one of those moments, but it is too soon to think I've mastered a new skill or practice. (I do no have the self-control this dog has!)

However, in my first week, I've realized this: In the past, I've tried to solve my over-indulgence by telling myself I can never have a particular food again. I would hold out for a while, and then I'd eventually cave and gorge myself on whatever it was. Once I did that, it was like I lost all self-control over food in general. On other occasions, I told myself that I could have anything I wanted, as long as it was in "moderation". Then, I'd find it was easy to consider moderation a bit larger each time, or to simply be moderate in the quantity of items I ate moderately.

For me, what I've realized and what I'm trying to practice is being mindfully moderate in what I eat. Virtually nothing needs to go on the "never" list. But that doesn't mean I should and will always indulge in a craving, even if it's just a tiny bite. Rather, when I want something to eat, everything has a cost and a benefit. Am I actually hungry? (If not, then don't eat at the moment!) How will what I want to eat nourish me? Since I can't have it everything that sounds tempting at the same time, is having x now worth giving up y? How much of x is healthy for me, and how does that compare to how much of x I would need to have to satisfy my craving for it?

As I grow in self-control, I will learn to respond to my cravings well. Sometimes, I'll choose to say yes, today, right now, I'm going to have x. Other times, I'll decide, it's not worth it this time around, and I'll have it another day. While it's difficult to say "not at this time", it's a lot easier than say "never".

And when I mess up, I won't consider it an unrepairable calamity.

Week 1 Weigh-In Results
Last week's cumulative total: 0 lbs (It was Ground Zero!)
This week's total: -8.5 lbs*
Total weight loss: -8.5 lbs

My nifty weight chart:

*Please nobody panic at the significant weight loss in a short time. Believe me, I was not restricting calories or working out to an unhealthy degree. I could produce witnesses to prove it! It's pretty common for a person to get a "jump start" in the first couple of weeks of a new weight loss program. (Hence the picture at the beginning of this post!) When one is morbidly obese (like I'm currently classified), that is just intensified. There was also a perfect storm of other factors that contributed, and I expect things to level off to a healthy 1-2 lbs per week in the next few weeks, assuming I keep working at it. :)

Day 3: My 2013 Minnesota Twins Weight Loss Challenge

First of all, a big THANK YOU to so many of you that have let me know in a variety of ways that you're supporting me in My 2013 Minnesota Twins Weight Loss Challenge. Just knowing that you were willing to take the time to tell me you cared - whether by "liking" my Facebook post or sending a message - means a lot. Also, for those of you that have said you're in this with me, whatever your goal is, WE can do this!

It's been a week of many good emotions, and everyone's support has been just one more thing that has just about brought me to (happy) tears. My brother got engaged on Day 2 of my challenge, and our family couldn't be more pleased. It's also one more motivating factor for me. I've even got a dress in mind that I'd like to fit into again...

On Tuesday (Day 1), I decided to try something new at my gym. I used to meet a few others at the gym, and there was an "AquaFit" class that was held when we were meeting. I loved to swim growing up, but I hate to be in a swimsuit now. However, I always thought I'd like to try this sometime. The people I used to meet, however, occasionally made fun of the class. A couple of times, I ventured that I thought it looked like something I'd enjoy. However, I let the disparaging remarks they made about the class keep me from giving it a try. It just seemed like another way to look stupid in their eyes (and, by extension, everyone else's eyes).

So, this week, I decided I needed to step out of my comfort zone and try it. It was very intimidating to walk in for the first time. I'm not a fan of new things because I don't like being out of control and I don't like people to see me mess up or fail at a task. When I walked into the locker room, there was a woman about my age (and about my size!) who had a dry swimsuit on, a pretty good bet she was on her way into the class. I was happy to see I wouldn't be the only person who didn't have gray hair. I was also brave enough to ask her what the "social norms" are for the class - do you bring your towel? need to get equipment first? get right into the pool or wait for the instructor?

The hour long class was great! There was a lot of aerobic activity, as well as resistance/muscle work. The class was at least 30 people, and it was split about 1/3 in my age bracket and the other 2/3 in the retired-but-not-elderly category. There was one older gentlemen who kind of took me under his wing, making sure I didn't stub my toe on the drain or that no one ran over me when 30 people changed directions running in the water - a lot harder than you might think for a short person! I really enjoyed being in the water, working out with others, and stepping out of the pool knowing that I worked hard. My hope is to make this class at least once per week, and I'm already worrying about how I can fit it into my week when my schedule changes for the summer. I'll have to see if I'm this excited after Week 2 of the class...

This week, I'm proud of myself for letting go of an area of my life where I've been too concerned about what others think. By letting go of what a few people said they thought about something that interested me, I discovered something I may really end up enjoying, that could have a positive impact on my health, and I reclaimed a little bit of my self-image, a little of control which I'd given away.

Also, a quick note, I'll post my progress sometime after my Tuesday weigh-ins. Mostly likely, late Tuesday night or early Wednesday morning. So, if you're interested in keeping tabs on how I'm doing, that will be the best time to check.

My 2013 Minnesota Twins Weight Loss Challenge

My passion for the Minnesota Twins just might save my life.

I'm certainly not the only person struggling with her weight. I'm also not the only person who has tried to lose weight, and has even been successful at times, but has yet to maintain that success. For myself, my net result is a little bit worse each year.

For years, I avoided regular doctors and stuck whenever possible to in-store clinics where I could get a prescription for strep throat but wouldn't get the "you need to lose weight" speech. It's not like I didn't know that already, right? After turning 30 last May, I decided it was time to make myself grow up and find a general practitioner. She was awesome and gave me the "you need to lose weight" speech without making me feel like dirt or a failure. (Check out the Aalfa Clinic for a great team.) I tried following her advice, but I wasn't ready, and I didn't deal well with some things - small and big stressors - that happened this fall and winter. (No surprise, I ate to dull my emotions.)

What does this have to do with the Twins? Following the team, cheering for them, and blogging about them at www.puckettspond.com has become my passion. I spend ridiculous amounts of time listening to game and sport show broadcasts, reading about the latest news, writing my opinion, and dreaming about when my next trip to my Favorite Place (Target Field) will be.

The team has been in a serious slump for two seasons, and my health has been in a slump my whole life. I weigh more than Joe Mauer (and not just by a pound or two), and he's got 14 inches on me and a lot more muscle mass. Truthfully, to get to my healthy weight range, I have at least 120 pounds to lose. I can't change it all in the span of a baseball season. It may not be possible to get to that range at all. But, I can  make a significant impact on my weight, health, and self-image. Why not use the Twins' rebuilding year (don't tell GM Terry Ryan I called it that) as a rebuilding year for myself?

And so the challenge was born.

I've decided that I will match the Minnesota Twins' regular season wins in pounds lost. Spring Training for the Twins starts today (Tuesday, February 12), and I am beginning my challenge today, even though the Twins don't get to "count" Spring Training wins in the challenge. And, I am extending my challenge through the end of the World Series. Even if the Twins surprise us all and make it to any postseason play, those games don't count in the challenge. It's my pounds from now until the end of the World Series vs. the Twins' regular season wins.

The Minnesota Twins won 66 games in 2012. The local sports show I trust the most is 1500espn.com's "Reusse & Mackey", and Patrick Reusse predicts the Twins win 10-15 more in 2013, putting the team at approximately 76-81 wins.

It's a lofty goal, but I know I can do it because I know my family and friends will support me...if I have the courage to ask them to. That's part of why I will be blogging about my experience. I'll be sharing my "pounds lost" every Tuesday, and I may add a post or two in between, updating my progress, struggles, and successes. I know my posts may not be read by many people (or anyone at all), but publically committing to writing about my experience will help me to be more accountable. I'm also helping myself find healthier ways to handle physical and emotional stress. I know finding other strategies that work for me will ultimately determine whether or not I succeed in my challenge.

Every challenge needs a reward. You might think losing the weight should be enough. However, when I meet this challenge, I am going to want to celebrate. Here's my plan:

• Match the the Twins in wins (+/- 5 lbs from their win total): treat myself to 2014 lower level tickets
• Beat the Twins record by losing 6+ lbs more than their total 2013 regular season wins: treat myself to 2014 dugout box tickets

Oh, and games are a lot less fun by myself. So, those rewards will be to treat me and a friend. Be supportive, and maybe it's you who will get to join me! ;)

I have eight-and-a-half-months to complete my challenge, a perfectly reasonable amount of time to lose 75-80 lbs. I will be breaking my challenge into segments, and the first one is "Spring Training": From today until Spring Training ends, I will plan my meals in advance, taking portion control into account, and I will follow my plans strictly. I'll also gradually increase my activity to at least three workouts per week, working toward doing 20 or more minutes in each workout. This will be a stricter plan than what I'll be able to follow for the rest of my life. However, I've been doing research on weight loss, as well as some soul-searching, and a stricter kick start will be the best idea in the long run.

March 31 is Easter Sunday, and April 1 is Opening Day at Target Field, so my Spring Training deadline is March 30. At that time, I'll re-evaluate and make plans for my next phase.

Thank you for reading this post, and thank you to those of you who are willing to support me in this. I can't put into words how much it means to me.